Updated: Apr 20, 2020
Coming at you hot from the icy cold mountains of Central Idaho to share one of the most important lessons that I've learned in this life:
Comparison is senseless.⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
Being a pageant girl, I come from the root of comparison. For those who have never slipped on a bedazzled bikini, platform stilettos and walked around stage for 20 seconds trying to flex every muscle in your body while also looking fluid, confident and like you're not terrified that your butt glue won't do it's job and you'll give the judges a shot that they can't un-see, let me tell you: I come from the straight up breeding ground for thoughts of comparison.
Ironically enough, this setting is also where I learned how harmful and completely NOT helpful these thoughts actually were. It took me 10 years... but I finally made it there.
*Snaps for that*
Guess what, buttercup, there will ALWAYS be someone better than you in one particular area. Sorry. There will always be someone prettier, smarter, funnier, more flexible, more fit, better at making omelets, etc. With over 7.53 billion people inhabiting this planet, it's not only bound to happen, it already HAS happened.
So with that liberating-yet-depressing fact out in the open, let's talk about the glorious caveat that follows. There is absolutely not a single soul on this planet who is exactly like YOU. There is no one in China, London, Oklahoma, or even in Papua New Guinea that has your exact chemical makeup or has all of your fantastically quirky mannerisms.
So why do we naturally compare ourselves to each other? It’s like comparing a dog to a cup of coffee or a pizza to a car. In order for a proper comparison to be legitimate anyway, all baseline factors must be the same, then we can properly judge the performances accordingly. There is not a situation in the world in which that is the case for humans. Even within the same household, we grow up with different experiences.
Any and every time we try to compare ourselves to someone else, we are forming inaccurate conclusions based off of a faulty experiment. It's quite literally not true. ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀
So sister friend, instead of eyeing down that girl in the fuchsia swimsuit who has a beautifully-feminine 8-pack and struts down that runway like Giselle, flip the script on your internal dialogue.
Instead of: "Ugh, she's way prettier than me, is in better shape than me, and obviously walks better than me, therefore she is better and I now have zero confidence in my own abilities."
Try: "She's stunning and is in fantastic shape; I'm also stunning, have worked just as hard to be here, have a show-stopping smile and can wall twerk in my living room like no one I've ever seen."
[Please don't do that last part on stage]
Boom. Apples vs. Oranges.
Appreciate and compliment her for how hard she has worked (either out loud or to yourself) and move on. Remember something about yourself that makes YOU fantastic. (It helps if it's funny because you also lighten up your mood instantly ;) )
Our reality is entirely our perception of it. Therefore, magnificence is in the eye of the beholder [who just so happens to be you].The ONLY important thing is how you view yourself. The successes of others do not take away from your own. They are not connected in any way. ⠀⠀⠀
You are 1 in 7.53 billion and baby, you were born to slay.
With love and an over-cooked omelet,
- Paige J.
The Rose Gold Queen